Saturday, January 23, 2010

More Introductions: Let's Get Some Things Straight, Huh?)

It usually doesn't take me this long to introduce myself. Only on occasion do I greet people with a shaking of hands and a "Hi, I'm Christopher. What's your name? Let me tell you my life story. Better yet, sit down for a minute and I'll read an excerpt from my newest blog."

For anyone who ever makes the bold decision to follow this blog, I just want you to know what's going on--what I'm raving about.

My academic life:
Okay, I suppose I'll have to build up to this so you don't create the wrong image of me. So how do I begin? Well, first of all--

Okay, fine. I go to private school. The terms gay, prissy, cocky, know-it-all, immature, and rich do not fit me. GET USED TO IT!

I'm floating in some strange limbo between straight A student and "almost straight A" student. Summed up indifferently by my sixth grade teacher so many years ago, my grades are "fine." I hate that word.

Math hurts my head. Science is math with a cooler teacher and less posters advertising pi. Spanish es asi asi. English has somehow made all of my writing, verbal, and literary obsessions boring. PE is PE. Lunch is, more often that not, lunch. Homeroom is, (shiver), homeroom. And art...Art, my friends, is my escape.

Was that corny?

Sports life
: I run in the autumn and spring and hate every minute of it. One of the highlights of my entire two years in track and cross country was driving back from the state cross country meet with only six people on the bus, when we got to stop at Chick-Fil-A.........Did I just say that? In the honest way that a remotely fit person can use a fat person's line like that, it was true. Running is necessary, but not a lot of fun.

I am also on a racist basketball team. Hey, I'm coming to terms with it. There are some really funny guys from my old school--but only two or three. Too bad.

Family Life: Great family. I can't resist teenager-ism enough to admit that. My parents are great. On the other hand, I'm a triplet: one guy and one girl and one me. That took a lot of courage to tell you (or you all? I can't tell), so I hope to avoid as many triplet jokes as possible. While there are one or two benefits to this curse, I mostly hate it. End of story. (Unless I plot to kill them anytime soon.)

Social life: Social life? Me? Ha!

Love life: My love life is the most pathetic concept on this planet. My crushes(not counting actresses, strangers, or blue women from Star Wars,) consist of mainly one girl.

This girl also happens to be my sister's friend. She goes to a different school. Neither of us can drive yet. We mainly one talk through e-mail. I've never been able to tell if she likes me or not...

And if this story--combined with the fact that a guy is telling you about his crush and labelling this section "My Love Life"--isn't pathetic enough for you, then try this: she knows I have a little crush on her because someone sent me a prank love compatiblity test--the cruelest invention on the fact of this planet. Once you enter in the names of your crushes, it sends it to the creator, (no, not The Creator), who in this case happened to be my crush.

Blogging life: I have two Blogger identities. One involves two blogs with a dozen real-life friends, just enough commenters, and constant feedback. The other involves what you see here. No comments yet and only two posts. On the other hand, thanks to my followers! Hip hip! Party at my place at 6:15!

My life: I am a nerd. And if you continue to read this blog, you'll discover that I embrace that fact more than any other aspect of my life.

3 people secretly have a crush on me:

thecircusbird said...

Although saying that art is your escape is quite corny indeed, I must say that I concur.

Yes, I've seen that crush calculator devil spawn before. Thank god I was too chicken shit to do it though.

That Blond Guy said...

Of course it's corny!!! Sometimes the truth is just really really corny, and there's no other way to see it than what it is. For instance, that was just REALLY corny. There you go.

Yeah, well--I should have been suspicious of the fact that a girl was convincing me--a guy--to try a love compatibility test. I'm really, really stupid sometimes.

Lokii said...

I gave up love in the 7th grade, and it's been working fine for me so far. Well, except now I get a bit jumpy whenever I see Colin Firth on TV (you know, because every. single. movie. He's in (excluding the ones where this doesn't happen) there's always some woman who has given up on love, and then he shows her how stupid she is, thinking that women a relationship...sorry *cough* (#: )
ALSO: Wow. You're basketball team sounds exactly like my german class. You poor, poor, mid-adolescent man-boy-thing