Knock Knock. Who's There? IT'S DA PO PO!!!!

Today something very disturbing and perplexing happened to me. It was sometime around 9 o'clock, and I was chatting with a friend of mine in the hallway. He asked me how I was, I said I was just fine, and then I asked him how he was. Before he could answer, though, his eyes went big and he clutched his throat. He was shaking violently, and his face was turning blue. I thought he was choking, but then he began to shrink.

He shrunk smaller and smaller as I watched in horror, and soon feathers began to sprout all over his body. His face, legs, and arms morphed and twisted, and finally he was only about a foot high.

I looked down in shock as I stared at the chicken that was now standing before me. It clucked and stared at me with those little black eyes, and I started to freak out and hyperventilate. What was I supposed to do? Call 911? They would just laugh at me. So I scooped up the chicken into my arms and ran off to go tell a teacher.

When I finally did find a teacher alone in a classroom in the Science Building, I ran in with the chicken in my arms screaming, "Help! Help!"

The teacher looked at me calmly and said, "What's the problem?"

I said, "I didn't know what to do! I was just talking to him and he turned into a chicken before my eyes. It wasn't my fault!"

The teacher was not at all troubled. He didn't even look at me. Instead, he looked straight at the chicken in my arms and said, "Greetings, my Lord. Do you have the stones?"

I looked down in surprise at the chicken. Amazingly, it nodded.

I gasped and let it drop from my hands. It flapped its wings and landed softly on the ground. The teacher gave a solemn bow and said, "Excellent. Shall we begin?"

In response, the chicken walked forward toward the teacher and opened its beak. Out came a small, smooth stone with little squiggly lines on it. He dropped it into the teacher's hands. The teacher said, "Water." Three more stones came out of the chicken's mouth, and the teacher said, "Earth, Wind, and Fire."

He cupped them into his hands and raised them to his face, saying, "These are the four elements: Earth, Wind, Fire, and Water. They are very powerful, but only when combined with the fifth element can they fulfill our purposes for them."

Now I was intrigued. "What is the fifth element?" I asked interestedly.

The chicken and the teacher exchanged glances. The teacher smiled.

"Don't you know, Christopher?" he said. "The fifth element is YOU."

I was shocked, but I also realized that a part of me had known it all along. I also somehow knew that we had very little time. After a moment of silence, I nodded and said, "Let's begin."

As I stood in the center of the classroom, the teacher set the four stones in a circle around me. After he had finished, he and the chicken stood side by side and bowed their heads, and the teacher began to chant in a very ancient language that I did not recognize. Then, each of the stones began to glow. I looked down and realized that I was glowing too. Then a beam of light shot between each of the stones and connected them, and a beam of light connected me to each of the stones as well.

The teacher's chanting reached a climax, there was a flash of light, and then everything was back to normal. Normal, except there was now a fourth person joining us in the room. I stared at him in awe.

"Jesus?" I asked.

He nodded.

TO BE CONTINUED

Movie Quote of the Day: "I'm thinkin' of tryin' out for a scholarship." -Bender, The Breakfast Club

Cheers,
That Blond Guy